At age 9, Siri Bardwell loves smoked salmon. It reminds her of her dad and his yearly salmon-fishing trips to Alaska. "He always had a beard and mustache when he came home," she says, grinning as she remembers the feel of his whiskered face.
At 13, Adam knows a truckload of information about horseradish. "My dad had the largest field in the world," he says. He even got to go with his dad on a horseradish haul to Superior, Wis. "The best part was going over the lift bridge in Duluth in a semi. That was fun."
Ann Bardwell remembers how much her husband loved hunting. "Deer hunting was a holiday to him," she says. "But his first love was always the kids. He loved being a dad."
The conversation quiets when Ann shows snapshots of a violently smashed pickup. It's the pickup Alan was driving on June 4, 2006, when he crashed on a rural road near Gonvick, Minn. He suffered grave injuries.
For three days Alan lay in a coma in the critical care unit at MeritCare Hospital, his family and friends constantly at his side. Life-support machines kept his body alive, but one test after the next showed no brain function. Then came a critical question: Would the family consider organ donation?
Cousin James
Alan had already made his decision. Months earlier, he'd decided to check the organ donor box on his driver's license – all because of cousin James.
James was severely diabetic—his eyesight was failing, he had dialysis twice a week and he faced the possibility of amputations. James was fortunate to receive a kidney and pancreas transplant. In winter 2006 he became healthy and strong enough to go snowmobiling with Alan. Right then and there, Alan decided that if anything ever happened to him, he wanted to be an organ donor.
When that time arrived, the family honored Alan's decision. "The whole family knew how Alan felt, so it was easy to respect his wishes," says Ann.
Grief journey begins in the hospital
"With two young kids, I sure wasn't ready to be a widow," says Ann. "LifeSource staff and MeritCare nurses were so helpful. They made sure I had a quiet place to process all that was happening."
LifeSource coordinates organ donation in the Upper Midwest, working closely with hospitals and families. Ethics, respect and sensitivity guide every step of the process.
For the Bardwell family, the creation of tangible reminders made saying goodbye a little easier. Nurses made ink prints of Alan's feet. Today Adam measures his foot against his dad's – just ¼-inch shorter. They also have a plaster replica of Alan's hand, now framed with lyrics from the song "Daddy's Hands."
From loss – to life
Alan was taken off life support on June 7. Within hours, two critically ill people on a national waiting list received word they were matches for Alan's kidneys. Their lives were forever changed because of Alan's gift. His corneas were donated so others could regain sight. Heart valves, bones and blood vessels brought healing to many more.
A high school science teacher in Bemidji, Ann has more than a passing understanding of organ donation. She wanted to make sure Adam and Siri understood, too. She remembers a conversation with Siri shortly after Alan's death. "This is awfully complicated," Siri said to her mom. "But I think I get it. God is recycling Daddy's good parts to save others."
Today, Ann takes great comfort in reading the letters she's received from families who benefited from Alan's donated organs and tissue. They tell of renewed health and hope.
Ann also makes presentations for LifeSource, encouraging people to consider organ donation. She explains to her audiences the great need: every 13 minutes another name is added to the national waiting list, and each day 17 people die while waiting for a transplant. One donor can save or enhance up to 60 lives.
A shared mission
Hospitals across the country share in the lifesaving mission of organ donation. In 2008 MeritCare received the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services Medal of Honor for Organ Donation – one of only 93 U.S. hospitals to receive the award four years in a row.
The day of Alan's funeral, the family released brightly colored balloons. All contained messages: "God Bless You" and "Donate Life."
If you're interested in learning more about organ donation, please contact Lifesource at (651) 603-7800.